Old and Slow

As we get older, some of us age gracefully and others of us seem to be falling apart at every turn. Always with a new complaint or ailment, often resulting in a convenient excuse why we can’t, or choose not to, do something. I fall squarely in the second group. While Kelly just finished her 17th marathon a couple weeks ago, my main achievement is making it through a day without some random orthopedic injury. The good news about this, however, is that I recognize this issue and I try to do something about it. Today I played pickleball in the rain (causing further injury but that’s not the point!) Last night I played ping pong in a garage and nearly decapitated myself on my friend’s bike that was hanging from the ceiling. It’s good that I’m short, to go along with old and slow. I have done more training rides in the past few weeks than I ever did for the ride 3 years ago, and I even hauled my ass up the infamous Bacon Rd. (Known to anyone in the Hazel Dell area of the Couv that might be bored enough to read this).

I can deal with the getting old. It’s a privilege, not a right, and certainly not a given. I can deal with the aches and pains that go with it. But here’s what really chaps my ass: I was riding my bike the other day and I got passed by a person on a Lime scooter. While it might have been an electric scooter, the person was still having to use their foot to skate along on the scooter. Here’s the speed scale as I see it:

1) Lance Armstrong (or whatever non-doped cyclist you may prefer - if one exists)

2) E-Bike on full turbo

3) European cyclists in their white bike shorts and half-unzipped shirts

4) Weekend warriors that ride in pace lines or pelotons with their bike clubs

5) Commuters

6) Beach Cruisers

7) Lime Scooters

8) Skateboards

9) Me

10) People in Grocery Stores in the Little Rascal things

As I was getting passed, I thought I would just get up out of the saddle and push a little harder. I figured that would have been kind of a dick move. By the time I processed that thought, it was already too late as the scooter was pulling away.

In the important news, I leave 2 weeks from today to drive out to Kansas City. For those that have asked, I’ll be starting in NE Kansas City. (The Missouri side of the river). I believe to this point, my bookie has taken 0 bets. Either you people don’t actually believe I’m going to do this (I am), my bookie is going to keep all the money and make up some rando name and claim they won (she’s not), or you’re all trying to see if your weather apps go out far enough to May 17th to try and get a leg up on the competition. $10 Venmo to @ErinScott12. Reference “Blow Me ‘25” and what you think the final destination will be. We’ll leave it open until a week before I start the ride.